Right now I would like to go out to our back shed and punch my arm through a double paned window! My depression is hurting so much.
I just had a friend say to me, Well, you know Dr. Oz and the other people on talk shows say you just have to get up and keep on doing something when you feel sorry for yourself or it will get worse.
I have been spending my time on my knees, reading good books, painting trim, visiting my daughter and I said something out loud. I said, "I had a room mate who asked "don't you think if we just think happy thoughts all of this depression would go away?" and I was this close to punching her."
I am sick of people with the belief that severe clinical depression is brought on by self will. I'm sick of people not understanding the difference between feeling down and having a chemical imbalance in the brain! I'm sick of medication! Things that don't work! I'm sick of feeling like a load of crap and someone wanting me to stop because it puts them out! Too bad! This is not a choice. I have a choice to make and I choose life as gut wrenching as it is at this moment!!!!!!!
A year of living like college students. Basically like living on nothing.
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